Tag Archives: Jesus

Dec 03 2014
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Identity

singles holiday guide: part 1

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With the holidays upon us and singles everywhere (somewhat) dreading going home to the same ole set of questions about their love lives, I thought it would be appropriate to address some questions that might pop up over the next few weeks. If you want to shut down any conversational advance from a pesky rando at family dinner, use the following responses:

Family Member: “So I guess your New Years resolution of getting a boyfriend didn’t work out.”
Response: “No, it did, but I broke up with him about 15 minutes in because all he could talk about was legos.”

Family Member: “Well, at least you don’t have to spend money on an extra person this year.”
Response: “You’re right…I didn’t buy you anything.”

Family Member: “You can totally go to Grandma’s early to help start cooking since you don’t have a family to get ready, right?”
Response: “Nah, but I WILL go to Grandma’s early to suck up and get all the good pieces of bacon before you suckers show up.”

Family Member: “Any prospects in your life yet?”
Response: “If by prospects you mean good movies to go see? Then, yes.”

Family Member: “Do you think you’ll ever get married?”
Response: “If it means I have to start asking for toasters, quilts, and light bulbs for Christmas, then NO THANK YOU.”

Okay, so those aren’t the most gracious responses, and I wouldn’t recommend saying them unless you have a pretty sarcastic family. However, I do feel for those of you that are inundated with questions about your single life from those closest to you.

It’s hard to be around people who only see your identity as single or married. Or divorced. Or childless. Or [fill in the blank].

Your relationship status is not who you are. Your value and worth come from Jesus alone! This season is to be lived in celebration of the God Man coming to earth to save us.

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. (Luke 2:11)

Remember that this holiday season as friends get engaged, weddings are attended, and well-meaning family members say some hurtful things. Remember that a Savior was born for you and me. And nothing outside of that truth really matters.

*at least Amy, Kristen, & Maya have a boyfriend this holiday season…

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Nov 19 2014
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Uncategorized

stuck in the suckiness

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I’m a pretty good complainer. I can take a 72 degree, puffy cloud and blue sky day and make it seem like we’re knee deep in snow and ice. And there’s definitely been seasons (pun intended) in my life where I’ve lived in the complaints. I’ve planted my feet firmly in the suckiness of life and not moved.

Disclaimer: please don’t tell my momma that I used the word “suck” – or some variation of the word – in this blog post. She hates the word and will make me run laps for it. Seriously.

Back to life being sucky.

I think we can get really good at complaining about life and not moving out of it. We can sit over coffee for hours and talk about how horrible we have it because we aren’t dating anyone, aren’t married, don’t own a house, don’t have any leftover pizza, etc. and just feel sorry for ourselves. We can get stuck in the suckiness, and that’s a dangerous place to be.

This summer I heard a sermon over the following psalm:

Will you not revive us again, that your people may rejoice in you? (85:6)

I think the writer was experiencing some suckiness. But I also think that the writer knew suckiness was not the place to stay in. They knew that they needed to go to the feet of the Lord and ask for revival, beg if needed.

As the pastor said during the sermon, revival may not come today. It may not even come tomorrow, or the next day/month/year. BUT we can’t sit in the crappy seasons of life complaining about how bad we have it and expect change. We can’t expect joy in our lives if we aren’t willing to go to Jesus and say, “Please. Revive my heart in ways only You can.”

It’s easy to stay stuck in the suckiness. It’s not always easy to pray for and wait on revival.

But staying stuck in the suckiness isn’t where Jesus wants us to stay. He wants us to stay with Him. So let’s agree to let each other be emotional people, to allow one another time to vent and express frustration, but to also remind each other that God is still God, God is still good, and we need to move out of the suckiness.

*get some travel advise from Judy Grimes here!!

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Nov 12 2014
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Identity

the voices in my head

I got to spend this past weekend at one of my favorite camps of all time: FCA Girls Weekend of Champions. It’s seriously the best. We had over 130 ladies join us for a weekend of competition and growth in our faith in Christ. It was a blast.

One of my favorite parts of Girls Weekend – and in particular this year’s camp – is how quickly girls get real with one another, with themselves, and with God. Our speaker did a phenomenal job of making the Gospel clear and real to these ladies. One of the things she talked about was our voice. She talked about how our voice got distorted in the fall, is effected by sin, but redeemed by Jesus.

And it got me to thinking – what is my voice saying.
Specifically, what is my voice saying in relationship to: others, myself, and Jesus.

I’d like to think my voice does a pretty good job in relation to others. I think I’m an encouraging person and that I build others up with my words.

But when it comes to myself and Jesus, I think my voice is less than awesome. My unchecked inner voice likes to tell me I’m not good enough. It likes to remind me that I’m alone. It prefers to keep me secluded and quiet with my struggles. And in that, I think it’s telling Jesus that He isn’t enough. That He can’t satisfy me. That He isn’t my refuge and rock.

My sinful voice is really good at lying to me.

But then I enter into the sanctuary of the Most High and find things like:

I am the LORD your God, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt. Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it. – Psalm 81:10

The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness; He will quiet you by His love; He will exult over you with loud singing. – Zephaniah 3:17

The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs – heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with Him in order that we may also be glorified with Him. – Romans 8:16-17

My sinful voice no longer has a say in my life. Jesus has redeemed me and made me His, therefore He gets to tell me who I am. He gets to tell me that I am good enough, that I’m not alone, that He is with me always. And I get to rest in His arms, reminded that He is enough. That He is all satisfying. That His voice alone gets to speak identity into my life.

It’s easy to let being single become my identity. It’s easy to let that voice remind me that I’m not married, I don’t have kids, etc. But it’s not worth it to let that voice win.

Let Jesus be your voice today and forevermore.

And for all you GWOC ladies…#suckitsatan

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Oct 22 2014
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Relationships

for all the dudes in the room

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I’ve spent a lot of time on this blog addressing the ladies. I felt like I owed one to all you fellas out there, specifically you single guys.

I don’t claim to be an expert on men. I mean, I am a lady so I really know very little about the mind of a guy. BUT I do know (somewhat) about the mind of women (because, again, I am one), so I want to take some time to express some things on behalf of my gender.

You don’t have to be perfect.

I think us ladies put a lot of pressure on you to be the perfect guy: muscular, rollin in the cash, spotless past, etc. I’m sorry for that. I appreciate your desire to be healthy and financially stable, but I know it’s not fair of me to put perfection upon you. Like you, I too am a sinful person that has been forgiven and covered by the blood of a perfect Savior. In my opinion, it’s pretty attractive that you recognize and admit your need for Jesus. Know that there is freedom from your imperfection and it’s okay to admit you don’t have it all together.

Please do your best to honor me, and I’ll do my best to honor you.

When I say “honor me” I don’t necessarily mean open every single door I need to walk through and bow as I enter a room. Although, if you do that, I’ll be extremely impressed. Well…for a little while…then I might just think it’s weird or that you’ve time traveled from 17th century England. I digress.

When I ask you to honor me, I’m asking you to treat me like you would your sister. I’m asking you to know that my heart is fragile and there’s a lot of pressure on me to “find a man” so leading me on is not okay. Making me feel like I’m the only girl in the world, as Rihanna would lead you to think I want to feel, is not awesome if I don’t have a ring on my finger. Until I am the only girl in the world for you, please help me guard my emotions by being upfront with me, making sure that we’re on the same page with things, and treating me as sister in Christ. That would be pretty legit.

And in return I’ll do my best to not read in to every single word you say or thing you do, whether good or bad. I’ll try to not turn that small thing you said in passing into a marriage proposal, and if you don’t text me back within .2 seconds I’ll do my best to not freak out and assume you hate me. (Cause us girls have a tendency to do things like that sometimes…and I’m sorry for that)

Know that it’s okay for you to be single too.

Just as there’s pressure on the ladies to find a dude and get hitched, I think there’s pressure on you guys as well to find a good woman. If Christ should be my first love, He should be yours as well. As I would tell any female out there listening, I’m going to tell you: don’t go to Jesus to get to marriage. Go to Jesus to get to Jesus and allow Him to fill all of the space you’re trying to fill with other junk. Let Him satisfy the deepest parts of your soul. Let Christ be your all in all.

I realize this is probably just the beginning of a much larger conversation. If that’s the case, let’s get a bunch of us together and talk about it! I really don’t think I’m asking for much here, but I do know that what I’m asking for takes a little bit of work. I don’t expect an overnight change either. I’m just asking that you let Jesus guide your singleness as well.

*to see what I hope you don’t run into on a cruise ship someday, click here!

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Oct 15 2014
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Relationships

it gets better

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When I think about heartbreak, two instances in my life stick out vividly. Once was a time when a “friend” pretty viciously attacked my character and motive and it made me question and evaluate every friendship I’d ever had in my life up to that point. No big deal.

The other time was by a boy.

The time the boy broke my heart was HARD. I look back at the night it happened and feel bad for my friends that had to deal with my weepy self. I say “weepy” as if I just cried a little bit and whined for a while. It was more like ugly-crying so hard my facial features were unrecognizable and I couldn’t form normal human sentences.

It. Was. Rough.

Looking back, I can honestly say the reason it was so rough was because I had placed all of my security, fulfillment, and approval in the relationship. I lived like this man could save me.

Then it came crashing down.

In reality, it was more like a quick trip on a sidewalk rather than a huge crash.

From both of these experiences I’ve learned a major lesson: life gets better.

It doesn’t get better because I now have amazing friendships (which I do). It doesn’t get better because I’m in an awesome relationship (which I’m not).

It gets better because I now see Jesus more clearly than I ever have in my life.
It gets better because I know within my bones that I am loved and approved by the God Most High.
It gets better because Christ has fought for me and won my heart.

I had a conversation last night with some very dear friends and told them that the one thing I wish young girls (and boys too) could understand is that life gets better.

Friendships are hard. Relationships are hard. Life is hard. But going through it with Jesus makes it so much better.

It is better to take refuge in the Lord
    than to trust in man.
It is better to take refuge in the Lord
    than to trust in princes.
-Psalm 118:8-9

Know that God is on your side. And know that it gets better.

*for a sweet pep talk from Bon Jovi, click here!

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