Tag Archives: friends

a Ross & Rachel kind of love

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I’ve spent a fair amount¬†of the new year watching “Friends” on Netflix. (PS, THANK YOU Netflix for FiNALLY streaming this beloved series)

The more I watch, the more I fall in love with this show. Super witty, heartfelt at times, and just down right fun.

And also, there’s Ross & Rachel.

Even if you’ve never seen a minute of Friends, if you live in America and are over the age of 12, you’ve heard of Ross & Rachel and know about their frantic, often confusing, on-again-off-again relationship. It’s possibly¬†the most notable storyline of the show. I cried the first time they broke up (last week).

However, as unpopular as these next words will be, I’m not a huge fan of their relationship. I don’t really want a Ross & Rachel kind of love.

They can’t seem to trust each other. They are extremely jealous at times (see: trust). They can be manipulative. I’ll just stop there while I still have some friends of my own left (no pun intended).

Yet, as I think about it, I kind of do have a Ross & Rachel kind of love. I can’t think of a relationship I’ve been in where I have always been 100% trusting, non-jealous, and not manipulative to some degree. But I don’t want that. I want to love in such a way that trust is easy and I don’t have to maneuver my way around to keep the guy.

And the only way this is possible is with Jesus.

Apart from security in Christ, I’m never going to trust someone. Apart from identity in Jesus, I won’t be able to keep myself from manipulating another human.

When I come to fully know the love my Jesus has for me, I can then know how to love another person fully. I can see how unlovable, untrustworthy, and undeserving I am, yet still chosen. I can act out of that great love, because Christ completes me. And chances are I’ll have a love greater than Ross & Rachel.

Now pardon me, I have another episode to watch.

*enjoy this fun little video montage of the lovebirds from the internets here!

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Be My Galentine?

It’s February 26 and I’m writing a post semi-related to Valentine’s Day.

BREAKING ALL THE RULEZ!

Let’s get down to business…(to defeat…the Hunnssss)

I think it’s a fairly common misconception that single women are perpetually lonely. When people ask me about my love life and I respond with, “I don’t have one,” approximately 94.3% of the time they will follow up with a version of, “Ooo are you okay? Are you lonely?”

No. I’m not lonely. And here’s why:

I have AWESOME friends. Both male and female.

On February 13th, some of my lady friends and I got together for the 2nd (hopefully annual) Galentine’s Day celebration. (We copied the idea from the television show Parks & Recreation. You should go watch it then we’ll be friends for lyfe.)
We got together at a restaurant and just spent time together being friends. In fact, some of us stayed there for 3 1/2 hours. That’s how much we like each other.

I have another friend that knows me so well, she can tell what kind of mood I’m in based on my text message responses.

I have other friends that bought me a bacon shaped bag clip and a Civil War history book as Christmas/birthday gifts.

These people have celebrated with me in the highs, and they have weeped with me in the lows. These people know me. They know me because about 4 years ago I realized how easy it is to fall into the misconception of loneliness just because I’m single, and it doesn’t lead to a pretty place.

I’ve realized that friendship is EXTREMELY (and I can’t stress extremely enough) important. The significance of having people in my life that know me deeply is something I find hard to put in to words.

In the second chapter of the entire Bible, God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone.” We were created for relationship. We were created to know and be known by others. The desire to be connected with those around us has been with us for a very long time.

Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I’m lonely, but it would be easy for me to fall in to that. Luckily the Lord has placed some amazing people in my life to keep me from falling in to that loneliness. For a period of my life I specifically prayed for God to bring solid women into my life that love Jesus, and He faithfully answered that. One by one, people started coming in to my life that won’t be leaving any time soon.

Do I sometimes feel lonely? Yes. But does loneliness consume my life? No. Because I’ve got my Galentines.

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