What Match.com Taught Me: Part 2

Part 2 in my online dating lessons: Labels do not equal Lifestyle.

I like to think of myself as a woman with standards. One of the filters I set up on my match.com search to aid in meeting those standards was that a man had to identify himself as “Christian-Protestant,” “Christian-Catholic,” or “Christian-Other.”

On any given day I could click the search button and scroll through more than 200 guys within a 50 mile radius that labeled themselves as one of the above. Talk about getting my hopes up!

The problem came when I would click on the camo-clad profile picture and actually read what the self-labeled Christian wrote. Over and over again I would read through profiles of guys that when given the chance to give more details about their faith would leave sections blank and never mention a relationship with Christ. It became ever so clear to me that so many in our culture claim Christianity but have no idea what it means to be a follower of Christ.

Now. Let me finish. I can hear some people now, “Well Kayla, you don’t have to beat the Bible through someone’s computer screen to prove you’re a Christian. Why should it matter if you write out the entire 119th Psalm in your profile or not?!”
To which I respond, “You’re right. You don’t have to give me your entire faith story on a screen, bbbuuuutttttttt it would be nice if you would at least let me know that your faith means something to you. Even if we end up not agreeing with each other.”

It’s not enough to label yourself as something. Back your stuff up. Live it out. Make others believe you are what you say you are.

If I told you I am a basketball player, but I can’t dribble a ball, then I’m most likely not a basketball player.

If I told you I am a volleyball player, you would be able to tell in .07 seconds that I’m not. Mainly because I kinda punch the ball whenever I try to serve it. My bad.

If I tell you I’m a Christian, I need to have some ground to stand on. You should know how important my faith is to me. My lifestyle should reflect my label, but my label does not automatically qualify my lifestyle.

Had even half of those profiles mentioned something along the lines of, “I know Jesus. Hope you do too!” we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation.

I’m worried that we’ve come to a point where just labeling our faith is enough. My challenge this week is to examine areas in our lives where we are satisfied with just a label being projected as a lifestyle. Once we find them, let’s change them. Let’s let our lifestyles dictate our labels. And let’s make sure they’re leading us towards Christ.

*note: editing contributions made by H Mae Wright. She’s da bomb.

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5 thoughts on “What Match.com Taught Me: Part 2

  1. Hannah says:

    I think about you punching that volleyball and it’s too much for me to handle. Great blog post, friend. I think even as Christians who could easily tell our gospel stories in our sleep, all of the above expectations apply.

    And hey! Who’s this lovely editor you speak of? Maybe she could edit my future American novel!

    • kayla says:

      Ha! If you’re looking for an editor, I’ll field all inquiries. Girl gets a lot of requests so it could take some time for her to look at your work.

  2. kleeellis says:

    This is SO true! A lot of people label themselves Christians without really knowing what it means. Then again, a lot of Christians are uncomfortable proclaiming their faith, especially on a dating website. Either way, it’s no good. I agree that if you’re looking to find someone online who shares the same level of faith (or dare I say a leader), you have to look for more than just a label. 🙂

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