This past weekend I had the privilege of being with 180 other women at my favorite camp – Girls Weekend of Champions. It’s just a bunch of us ladies hanging out, playing sports, and dancing the days away. AND talking about Jesus and His goodness. I love this camp. I love that I get to see young ladies come to know Christ and grow in their relationship with Him. I love that I get to see God on display through those I serve alongside and I’m continuously amazed that He would choose to use even me for the betterment of His Kingdom. I walked away on Sunday evening feeling on top of the world – knowing that God had done a great and mighty work.
Then Tuesday happened.
Monday was good because I got to sleep past 5:45am.
Tuesday rolled around and I was so tired and beat up, I could barely figure out which hand was the one I was supposed to write with. And I’m not even ambidextrous.
I felt so attacked by the enemy and just had a heavy heart. I was sad about weird things and kept trying to dig myself out of this strange pit.
I think the enemy likes to try to get me like that. I think that after my good days, he likes to remind me that I’m alone, that I really don’t have value, that I’m unlovable, that I’m not worthy.
And I believe him.
After spending a weekend with young ladies reminding them that THEY have value and are loved by the Most High God, I let the father of lies in to my head and believe the crap he tells me.
My heart is so fickle and I’m so easily swayed from the Truth.
Thankfully, I had enough sense to open up God’s Word (let’s be honest, I didn’t feel like it but knew I needed to…I’m not that great of a Christian). What I came to reminded me that God alone speaks Truth over me:
For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. (Psalm 62:5-8)
As my new friend would say, satan can suck it. God alone gets to tell me who I am. He only is my rock – I shall not be shaken. No amount of singleness, marriage, children, or even cheese (my true love) can affect my stance with my Father. I am His and He is mine.
Sometimes we can fall pretty hard, pretty fast, but I’m so thankful for a Good Father that kindly draws me back in and reminds me that He is good always.
*to watch Toonces the Cat drive a car, click here!
Kayla Smith 