Loving Myself More Than You

First of all, “Back Here” by BBMak just started playing on my Pandora station. Excuse me while I have a mental sing-a-long in the middle of Starbucks and revert back to a teenage girl.

Okay. I’m back.

I’ve found that I am a pretty selfish person. I like myself quite a bit. It can be easy for me to get so caught up in my “problems” that I neglect loving and serving those around me.

And when I say “problems,” I mean it in the loosest sense of the word. I get caught up in singleness, unhappiness, pride, things that you could dub #firstworldproblems.

When Jesus called me into His Kingdom, He did not call me to self-centered pity parties to be thrown on the regular. When I allow myself to get caught up in things like being single, it takes away from the service that Christ HAS called me to.

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.-John 13:34-35

Notice that Jesus doesn’t say, “all people will know you are my disciples, if you have love for yourself.”
He commands us to love one another.

I don’t know about you, but I find loving others pretty hard when I’m super caught up in my own junk and all I dwell on is how rough I have it.

Newsflash: I don’t have it that bad.

I have been redeemed by Jesus. Which, last time I checked, means that I have been called to freedom (Galatians 5:1) from feeling bad about myself. The Most High loves me enough to save me from my sins, and in return I am to love others. Not wade in the pool of self-deprecation that would be easy for me to hang out in.

It’s easy to rest in the misery of being single and watching everyone around you get married and start a family and go on awesome vacations and live in cool places and…[insert other things I’m not currently doing here]. (Also, I use the word misery in a sarcastic way. My life isn’t miserable. I had enchiladas for lunch today, so….yeah…life is pretty great.)

It’s harder to put others before myself and generously love them in spite of my emotions. But that’s what Jesus has called us to. Love of others, not love of self.

Question: how does being caught up in singleness/unhappiness/fill in the blank keep me from loving & serving those around me? How can I set my selfishness aside and love deeper this week?

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